How To Test If Your Family Is Watching Too Much TV

1) When someone calls your home, does your family erupt into a chorus of, “The phone, the phone is ringing”?

2) When your child is introduced to a Spanish speaker, can they carry on a conversation so long as it involves using a map, a backpack, and climbing a mountain?

3) When you head to the beach this summer, will your family’s only means of traveling from the dunes to the water involve rolling?

4) If someone were to introduce you to their new friend, would Caillou seem like a perfectly reasonable name for them?

5) When visiting a farm, do you expect to hear the voice of Mel Brooks coming from any or all of the sheep?

6) Have you ever been at the deli line and, after finding that your ticket number was number 9, remark, “Hey, that’s the number of the day”.

7) Have you ever accused your car (or any other mode of transportation) of being cheeky?

8) Do you find yourself spending more than a little time wondering how two engaging, brother and sister rabbits can lead such fulfilled lives while never ever producing any evidence of parents?

9) Even though you’d publicly denigrate the show for its nonsensical contribution to childrens television, does a laughing baby framed in the sun make you feel warm and fuzzy inside?

10) Would a check of your iTunes file unearth the song “There’s a Party in my Tummy (So Yummy, So Yummy)?

**If you answered yes to at least 7 of these questions, it’s time to turn off the television.

****However, since I love to reward mindless knowledge, if you can send me a list of all the shows alluded to in this quiz, I will devote an entire blog day to singing your wonderful praises. Send your answers to: dalessandrochristine@gmail.com