Monday, March 31, 2008

The Votes Are In....

First, I realize the votes have been in for a while now, but I’m still playing catch-up.

Second, I have managed to find a few more useless baby inventions and, thanks to an intervention from my family, I’ll be taking a break from my useless baby product obsession after this post (at least until next week). Among the newfound craziness:

Baby Cologne- A product by Johnson & Johnson that systematically destroys one of the best things on earth: the sweet smell of a baby after a bath. Why would anyone want to change or mask that?

Nite TrainR’- I realize bedwetting can be a very serious problem for lots of kids, but at no point should this device (which attaches to the “undercarriage” of a little one and sounds an alarm to rouse the child) be used. Is this really necessary? Who is using this? I guess the answer to the latter would be the same people who use an invisible fence to keep their kids in the backyard.

- This product came to me from the paragon of loveliness, Mrs. Lydia Rydel. This is a bib that is part terry cloth, part plastic, and employs a scrunchy-like mechanism around the neck, all to ensure that the child remains dry, stain-free, and comfortable at the neck while dining. Now, if someone were to give this to me I would certainly enjoy all of the aforementioned benefits, but do all of our advances in technology need to be employed to engineer a better bib? I mean, unless the bib can feed the child, wipe his or her mouth, and check the nutritionally content of all that is ingested, I am not spending $13 on a fancy bib.

And now for the voting results…

Of no surprise, the overwhelming winner is the wipe warmer (my second choice). This product protects little tushies from the horror of being touched by something cool. Not only is this product ridonkulously unnecessary, it is also not the safest thing. A former student of mine once told me about a time when, having left it on for an extended period, the warmer actually caught fire!

I chose the diaper genie for all the reasons I originally posted, as well as its contribution to the laziness factor that is reaching epic proportions in our country (see also: shopping cart returns).

The other options (boppy, child leash, and bottle warmer) came in well behind the others.

Thanks for voting….and check out this week’s poll.


Abbie, Paul, Drew and Charlotte's Web said...

I think the Nite TrainR' is actually used for older kids that have bed wetting "issues". I remember an episode of "Dif'rent Strokes" when Arnold had to use such a device...I've now dated myself.

One Maid A' Milking said...

Close...they actually gave Arnold a sugar pill in hopes that the placebo effect would correct the behavior. At no point was anything attached to him. Additionally, it is becoming increasingly apparent that I know entirely too much useless information.