The Whole World is Going to Hell (or, at least Orange County)

As parents who want the best for our children, we take the time to read to our little ones each day. With books devoted to teaching good behavior, encouraging their imagination, introducing them to letters and numbers, and giving them the sense of the world around them, there is almost no topic not touched on in Childrens literature.

Case in point: the very real and pressing subject of plastic surgery.

Thinking of tucking in that tummy? Feel the need to smooth those wrinkles and lift those brows? Interested in a little lipo?

If you are considering plastic surgery, but hesitate because you are concerned about how you’ll explain the recovery and changed appearance to your child(ren), there is now an answer!

Thanks to the brilliant mind of Dr. Michael Salzhauer, My Beautiful Mommy will be released this Mother’s Day, and offer mothers the opportunity to explain their elective procedure to their little ones.

According to perezhilton.com:

Before her surgery the mom explains to her little girl that she is getting a
smaller tummy: "You see, as I got older, my body stretched and I couldn't fit into my clothes anymore. Dr. Michael (the author's homage to himself?) is going to help fix that and make me feel better."

"Mom" comes home looking like a slightly bruised Barbie doll with demure bandages on her nose and around her
waist.

The text, unfortunately, doesn't mention the breast augmentation, but
the illustrations intentionally show Mom's breasts to be fuller and higher.
Dr. Michael the author explains, "I tried to skirt that issue in the text
itself. The tummy lends itself to an easy explanation to the children: extra
skin and can't fit into your clothes. The breasts might be a stretch for a
six-year-old."

The report also points out that the book doesn't explain exactly why the mother is redoing her nose either. Nonetheless, Mom reassures
her little one that the new nose won't just look "different, my dear—prettier!"

Naturally, the ending is happy. Mommy is "even more" beautiful than before, and her daughter is thrilled.

I have so much to say about this, I am not sure where to begin. I guess I’ll just go with one word:

EGREGIOUS!