Thursday, February 14, 2008

Happy Valentine's Day

For this Valentine's Day....a challenge!

Let me begin by clarifying that I am not an ungrateful wife. My husband is a wonderful man who takes care of his family better than anyone I know…and, as far as Valentine’s Day, he could give me a wink I would be fine with it (though, coming home early would be nice too).

Anyway, that doesn’t mean he has not provided me with a few opportunities to blog at his expense and, in celebration of Valentine’s Day, I give you….
The Worst Valentine’s Gift Ever:

The year was 2003 BC (before children) and we were enjoying a candlelit dinner accompanied with soft music and a nutty wine. We laughed as we toasted our second Valentine’s Day as a married couple and anticipation mounted as he placed a heart bedazzled bag in front of me. What could it be? Jewelry? Theatre Tickets? A new pre-diaper bag purse? No, not even close. It was…

The puppet dog from the commercials.

Cute dog. Funny commercials. But, nothing says I love you like a sock puppet????

So the question is, can anyone top that? I doubt it--- but the challenge is on. Leave a comment if you can beat my gift.

**Inside joke alert: “I’ll give you two dollars. I’ll give you three dollars.”


Lawyerboy said...

No, I've got one that beats it. My wife went around the house last night and pulled all the garbage together (usually my task on Wednesday evenings), put it in the garage and when I returned home from the supermarket with flowers for her, said "Happy Valentine's Day honey."

Disgruntled wife said...

Dear lawyerboy,
Did you follow this blogger's advice on what to do for or give your wife for Valentine's Day? I think not, as you made yourself (not her) a nice breakfast and left the dishes in the sink for her to clean up. Be thankful she left the garbage in the garage and not your side of the bed.

Anonymous said...

Let me give a little history before I give you my story. My hubby for some reason was under the impression that I liked very large stuffed animals, so he would get me one for every occasion. Within a couple of years, I had a very large collection and had to ask him not to get me any more. What does he do the following Valentine's Day??? He comes home with a 4ft Dachshund stuffed animal which read "I love you this much" across the body. I must admit it was adorable, but really didn't need to add to my collection. I know it's the thought that counts....but he obviously wasn't thinking!


Lawyerboy said...

Dear disgruntled wife,
That may be true, but it does not change the fact that your gift to me was garbage. Literally, garbage. I'd take a sock puppet any day. Moreover, I doubt One Maid A' Milking intended this blog to be a domestic dispute resolution forum. (And, by the way, my eggs were really runny this morning and the toast was cold. You wouldn't have wanted me to make breakfast).

OnceAJerseyGirlToo said...

LB and DG...
I am having flashbacks of your fight at Joan T's graduation party (10 big years ago). Next year you should do what Brian and I did...decide that all you need is love on V-day, especially when husband is chaperoning a middle school dance and wife is teaching ESL that night. While I did not get much (materially speaking) from Brian, a charming group of Albanian students brought me a bag of skittles (original flavor, not tropical blast, than God...or should I thank Allah?).

OnceAJerseyGirlToo said...

I thought I gave you that sock puppet!...Seriously, I really thought I did. Are the days between 22 and 25 really that much of a blur? Or was my part of our apartment that much of a disaster that I bought it for you and never gave it to you because it was lost in my filth? Or...did Donna steal it?

OnceAJerseyGirlToo said...

Oh...Lawyerboy...I want to beat you to the proverbial punch and say that I know I left out the "k" in thank in my first blog.