And I thought Christmas was over...

So the paragon of professional journalism, People magazine, as well as some unfortunate manager, have confirmed the names of JLo and Marc Anthony’s new babies: Max and Emme.

Now, some of you may like those names (one of my favorite kids in the world bears the first name), but the obvious needs to be pointed out to show what a knucklehead J to the L-O is.

Two words: Dragon Tales

In other J Lo news, reports are coming out that the new parents have enlisted the help of additional bodyguards, as well as two handlers to rock the babies around the clock, as needed. Apparently, hundreds of surgical masks have also been ordered to ensure the health and well-being of the children... (audible sigh).