This post will be a new segment to the blog focusing on all the ridiculous things new parents do to maintain their sanity while trying not to confront the reality that this is their life now.
Example Number 1: The Art of Keeping A Child Awake in the Car to Make it Home for Nap
Though my daughter has been known to sleep through security alarms, jackhammers, and absurd storms buffeting our house coming off the farm, a lot of people I know have children who will not make the transition from car to bed when travelling coincides with naptime. Ten minutes passed out in the car somehow convinces them that they have sufficiently rested and the long march of the day's remains begins.
For that reason, parents will go to great lengths to keep their kids awake until they are able to tuck them safely in their beds for naptime. Consider these the best/most ridiculous techniques:
5) Sing as loudly as possible, especially songs that are more interactive and stimulating (e.g. "Wheels on the Bus", "Itsy Bitsy Spider", "Oops, I Did it Again", etc.)
4) Stockpile stimulating, noisy toys around the car seat (travel size etch-a-sketch, mini computers, stickers).
3) Sugar, sugar, sugar.
2) Offer up typically taboo objects (cell phones, keys, paper shredder)
1) Play "Which Window?" Using your automatic window controls, challenge the sleepy subject to guess which one will come down next....windy days are a plus.
I'm 32, a dad, and I am not a douchebag...
6 years ago