Except for maybe my father-in-law, there is no one on the planet who maintains a better arsenal of eye-roll inducing jokes than my Uncle Bobby.
And both men never fail to absolutely crack me up.
For example: Fun With Words
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
Police were called to a day care center where a 3-yr-old was resisting a rest.
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
Monday, June 23, 2008
The First Year
Saturday marked my son's first birthday, and though the year has been quite a whirlwind, I simply cannot believe how quickly the time has passed.
As he starts to say words, point at different things he wants, and generally respond to the world around him, I am as excited by his advances, as I am equally eager to hit the pause button and hold onto these fleeting moments.
All of this reminds me of an interview I read years ago with actor and comedian, John Leguazamo. In the interview, he was asked about fatherhood and what it was like to have children. He responded:
"The days are so very long, and the years are so short."
I remember thinking what an interesting response it was, having no idea how true his words were. I think of all the times I glance at the clock, eager for a break at the end of the day. I think of all the minutes I waste doing so many other things instead of just sitting with my children and enjoying our time.
And as I constantly capture every one of my children's moments on film, I can't help but wonder if, in all my preoccupation with wanting to preserve these memories, maybe I should just put the camera down and live in them.
As he starts to say words, point at different things he wants, and generally respond to the world around him, I am as excited by his advances, as I am equally eager to hit the pause button and hold onto these fleeting moments.
All of this reminds me of an interview I read years ago with actor and comedian, John Leguazamo. In the interview, he was asked about fatherhood and what it was like to have children. He responded:
"The days are so very long, and the years are so short."
I remember thinking what an interesting response it was, having no idea how true his words were. I think of all the times I glance at the clock, eager for a break at the end of the day. I think of all the minutes I waste doing so many other things instead of just sitting with my children and enjoying our time.
And as I constantly capture every one of my children's moments on film, I can't help but wonder if, in all my preoccupation with wanting to preserve these memories, maybe I should just put the camera down and live in them.
Profile of a Parent
A wonderful follow-up to last week's profile, Chris is the first person to correctly identify our weekly Guess Who? and also the husband of last week's profile, Susan. However, unlike the perfection that is Susan, Chris has at least one known flaw....he is a Red Sox fan.
I'll let this one run anyway....
Profile of a Parent
Name: Chris, aka: Daddy, Babe, Fernando
Father of: Abigail (3) and Kyleigh (8 months)
What You Did Before You Were Someone’s Daddy: Edited exciting network TV sports stuff, went to movies, played video games, played piano on a regular basis, ate at restaurants and enjoyed lazy Saturday mornings with my lovely wife.
What You Do For Yourself Now: Get up early, go to work early, edit infomercials, get home early, play rigged games of Candy Land, recite lines from “Finding Nemo”, play “If You’re Happy and You Know It” on the piano on a regular basis, videotape and shoot digital photos simultaneously, and fall down a lot. But every now and then I still get to do cool job-related things, like go to Wimbledon for ESPN (woo hoo!)
What is your favorite thing about being a father? Seeing the joy of discovery in my girls’ eyes every time they do something new – They both have such a bottomless well of excitement!
What is the one thing you wish you’d known before you had children? “Sleeps through the night” means “Gets up at 5 AM”.
What would you do with an extra free hour in your day? If it were in the morning, I’d use it to sleep. Any other time of the day, I’d concoct grand plans to finish projects around the house, get in shape, and find new and exciting outlets for my creativity. And then I’d end up wasting that hour checking e-mail and watching baseball on TV.
Who are your go-to people when you have a parenting questions? My wife Susan knows all when it comes to our little girls. I think she may have secretly received a how-to manual at the hospital, since she always seems to know exactly what to do or say in any situation (as opposed to my constant state of making-it-uppitude).
What is the one thing your child(ren) do that always makes you smile? Really, all they have to do is smile at me to make me smile back. Abigail has been really cute lately, though – Whenever I do something that makes her happy (play a game with her, do a puzzle with her, put in her favorite movie), she’ll turn to me and give me a big hug, then say “Oh, thank you Daddy!” in her cutest little girl voice. How can a dad not smile at that?
Who is your favorite fictional mother? Family Guy’s Lois Griffin
If you could be someone you know for a day, who would it be?
I would be my incredibly talented baseball-playing cousin Blaise, if only to know what it is like to actually have some real athletic ability. (Look for him in a major league ballpark near you in 2013!)
If you could ban people from doing something, what would it be? I’d say being a Yankees fan, but everything that is truly good and heroic needs something dark and evil to be its foil. So instead, I would ban politicians from polluting our airwaves with ad after negative ad during election season. Enough is enough.
If you could make one mixed CD that would be the only music you could listen to for the rest of your life, what songs would you put on it? “Hey Jude” by the Beatles, “#41” by Dave Matthews Band, “Alice Childress” by Ben Folds Five, “Summer Highland Falls” by Billy Joel, “Levon” by Elton John, “Daniel Lee” by Sarah Borges & the Broken Singles, “Curbside Prophet” by Jason Mraz, “What Is and What Never Should Be” by Led Zeppelin, “Old Love (Unplugged)” by Eric Clapton, “Alcohol” by the Barenaked Ladies, “Bad Man Walking” by Gov’t Mule, “Breaking the Girl” by the Red Hot Chili Peppers, “Fly From Heaven” by Toad the Wet Sprocket, “Sing Sing Sing” by Benny Goodman, and of course “One More Minute” by Weird Al Yankovic.
Let's keep this going....send your own answers, along with a picture, to: dalessandrochristine@gmail.com
YIKES
Having carried a rather large baby for nine, long months, I distinctly remember the reactions of my friendly Philadelphians as I waddled down Walnut, seemingly defying gravity. People asked when the twins were due, or even how overdue I was (at 7 months).
Despite all of this, I have nothing on these people......
Despite all of this, I have nothing on these people......
Quote of the Day
"There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million." ~Walt Streightiff
Picture of the Day
In order to truly commemorate the signficance of his first birthday, nothing quite leaves the mark of permanence like bright blue Cookie Monster icing on a light carpet.
Send your favorite kid pictures to: dalessandrochristine@gmail.com
Sunday, June 22, 2008
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